if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
