No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
