went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
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well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
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i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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