hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize