i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize