I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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