Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
