Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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