Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
