I feel great
I just peed on a car
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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