Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
