you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
