What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
