I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
