i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
