butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
