you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
