Don't make out with my wife yet
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
