I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize