Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
