We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
