Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
