therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize
