Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
