I hope mine doesn't look like that
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
