Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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