Texts From Last Night

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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right.  I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..

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  (267) 4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right.  I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room.. http://tfl.nu/v238
  Replies (7) Good night (3857) Bad night (823)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.

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  (702): yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark. http://tfl.nu/ahfc
  Replies (12) Good night (2062) Bad night (536)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Do you remember last night at all? Be honest

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.

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  (703): Do you remember last night at all? Be honest (215): I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps. http://tfl.nu/7u3j
  Replies (11) Good night (3208) Bad night (578)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit

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  (403): Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit http://tfl.nu/h77n
  Replies (9) Good night (746) Bad night (2241)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free

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  (303): This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free http://tfl.nu/nn6t
  Replies (8) Good night (2983) Bad night (640)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.

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  (503): and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath. http://tfl.nu/qhij
  Replies (15) Good night (686) Bad night (3472)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.

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  (717): My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential. http://tfl.nu/qhq9
  Replies (23) Good night (963) Bad night (4760)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?

  (1-617): View more from Massachusetts

  Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend

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  (617): Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents? (1-617): Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend http://tfl.nu/hheb
  Replies (28) Good night (3750) Bad night (1198)
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  (956): View more from Texas

  Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.

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  (956): Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars. http://tfl.nu/dx00
  Replies (29) Good night (1585) Bad night (784)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge

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  (248): My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge http://tfl.nu/bj9s
  Replies (16) Good night (2140) Bad night (606)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do

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  (231): I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do http://tfl.nu/swrn
  Replies (5) Good night (1068) Bad night (472)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.

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  (423): We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers. http://tfl.nu/yz9j
  Replies (2) Good night (606) Bad night (210)
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  (707): View more from California

  He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.

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  (707): He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro. http://tfl.nu/sp67
  Replies (3) Good night (783) Bad night (282)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.

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  (720): Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality. http://tfl.nu/zwr4
  Replies (0) Good night (407) Bad night (277)
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  (315): View more from New York

  i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex

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  (315): i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex http://tfl.nu/a41g
  Replies (7) Good night (592) Bad night (237)

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