it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize