the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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