Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
