just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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