At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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