hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Randomize
