I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
