I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
