Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize