their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
