He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
