Jerry, you need to find god
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
