Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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