she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
