they need to just BURY HIM!
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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