btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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