I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
