My liver just broke up with me...
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
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you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
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Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
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