Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
