I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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