I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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