We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
