only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
