absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
