I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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