More tranny stories later!
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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